While preparing for one of my morning classes the phrase came into my head, “Don’t make today’s coffee with yesterday’s grinds.” Simple yet poignant, it became like a mantra I recited. I realized how applicable it is to so many areas of our lives. The “grinds” of yesterday come in a variety of forms. Experiences, assumptions, disappointments, expectations, interactions, emotions, habits, patterns - these are our grinds. Instead of being energized by fresh ideas and clear-eyed vision, we are sipping a watered down, under-caffeinated cup of yesterday’s grinds. We step into situations in the same manner that we created them expecting something different to occur. Old grinds cloud the new brew and rob it of it’s potential.

Let’s look at an example. You run into a friendly acquaintance and the interaction seems a bit awkward or tense, but you don’t know why. You walk away and all of the sudden you start to create a story that you attach to the interaction. Maybe they think you wronged them. Maybe they’ve wronged you! When you interact with them next, you are carrying the pieces of those stories (the grinds) and it becomes more awkward. Next thing you know the gap between you has widened and really neither one of you has any clue how this started. Has something like this ever happened to you? Your perception of an interaction so clouded your vision that it actually created your future. Don’t make today’s coffee with yesterday’s grinds.

Or how about this. The last time you talked to your coworker they were overflowing with praise about the project you’re working on and offered some great encouragement. Today, you go to speak with them about some details you have to iron out. They are distracted, short with advise and more critical than encouraging. You take this personally. Maybe the project is doomed to failure. You are a failure no longer worthy of praise. You become withdrawn and less confident. You become unsure. You let the grinds of that one interaction become the base for every other day’s cup. Don’t make today’s coffee with yesterday’s grinds.

I once worked in a community organization with someone whom I felt had always disliked me. The tension was so palpable that people questioned our ability to work together on a committee that we were both assigned to. Then one day, they did something hurtful. I was angry but I was also really tired of this completely unnecessary game of charades. So I changed the grinds so they were sweet instead of bitter. The next time that person went through a difficulty (which was not long after) I reached out to them. I gave encouragement and expressed gratitude for the contributions they’d made and opened my door to them. Our relationship changed that day. We didn’t become best friends, and I doubt we ever will, but a new foundation was built and we are on much better footing. There is an unspoken understanding that I do not wish harm on them, which makes it easier for them to be kinder towards me. That day’s coffee was made with new grinds.

We have the opportunity to approach each day with a renewed energy and interest. Toss the old grinds not only for yourself, but for others as well. Let your past experiences bring wisdom, but don’t let it block new growth. And by all means, make a fresh brew, wipe the sleep from your eyes, and step into the day with renewed purpose and vision. You’ll be surprised how different your interactions are when you’re not starting with old grinds.